The Let-Down & the Warning

This is in response to a discussion. It started with the suggestion that there be a website resource that would provide both contact information for vendors, performers and speakers, and rating and reporting for the same people.

From Web of Trust
http://www.resourcesforlife.com/docs/item5706

While there were some good suggestions (branching into even more groups of people) and some great support, there was also the couple of responses that were less thrilling.

One type of this response was the compromise response: we should keep it local; we should keep it locked/inaccessible. All saying, "We should take this things teeth before it can actually make a difference."

The other type of this response was the defense lawyer (as far as I know or can tell, none of these responders are actually at all familiar with the legalities of this situation): someone might sue; be careful of libel/slander; you want to protect yourself.

So, to this discussion, I say: 

I live 50 miles from the nearest official pagan anything, 200 miles from most of our activities, 400 miles from the closest major festival. How local do I need to be before I'm allowed to know if my children will be safe? Kenny Klein and many others travel the country, if not the world. How does "local" keep organizers in any kind of loop for being even in a position to know that something is a possibility?

There are lots of Pagans that talk behind backs. Someone might sue for libel/slander. When did Paganism become the religion of the fearful? When did doing what's right to protect and defend our fellow humans become too risky? When did protecting children turn into a a slanderous act?

I'm begging someone to explain why raging BNPs and lying gossips have more rights then abuse victims do?

Lady Liberty League's Logo
https://www.circlesanctuary.org/index.php/lady-liberty-league/lady-liberty-league

Let me be clear on this. From my (admittedly laymen) research, libel and slander simply do not apply when reporting a complaint. Making an accusation is a whole different game. This is saying, "A person made this statement about BNP Such-n-such."Adding that legal statements were made, or charges were filed, or a conviction was made, are all reporting, not the statement that could support an accusation of slander. (Or libel, cuz it would be in print.) BNP Such-n-such can threaten to sue all they want, but reporting like that doesn't give them anything to sue about. That's why you can't sue a newspaper for mentioning the arrest report of your DUI.

As far as the complaints go, I would like to see better, more comprehensive complaint procedures across the board. How do you document it so it doesn't come back and bite you? What should you report as an event organization? What MUST you report as an event organization? How do you go about making or forwarding legal complaints to the legal system? Who do you make or forward them to?

Officers of Avalon Logo
http://www.officersofavalon.com/

We, as a community, have two (that I can think of right now) organizations that would be ideal for setting up such a system: The Officers of Avalon and the Lady Liberty League. We should be using these resources and working to set up a system. Why? Because we do not want to become the pedophile joke that the Catholic Church has become. We don't want that reputation, and our current course, guided by fear of someone important getting their feelers hurt, puts us right there in creepy-ville.

We NEED a reporting system. One that is as fair and unbiased as possible, but one that is easy to use, easy to access, and easy to update. We NEED to keep track of these things, because it has just been proven that one person can cut a huge swath of harassment and abuse across the entire country and over the course of decades. We need to put on our big kid panties and take responsibility for the environment that we have worked so hard to create. We've done well, but now we need something more.

To those who fight this movement, who say that there's a reason not to do this, that there is too great a chance for abusing whatever system we set in place, that we've worked too hard to create a culture of sexual freedom and positivity... To all of those people, I am telling you now: your arguments make me want to look closer at why you want to keep this stuff in the shadows, at what you might be hiding and how your behavior might be hurting others. And stay away from my kids.

No Room for Error, No Room for Growth: The Zero-Tolerance Epidemic

Zero tolerance. The phrase is supposed to make us secure, knowing that certain things are simply not going to happen.

The marketing on it is solid and visceral. It appeals to our gut emotions, to our fears about the world. Bullying; not in our school! Discrimination; not in our workplace! Electronics; no distractions here!

What happens, though, is the same thing that happens any time we create a system of judgment and punishment that is black and white. When we encounter shades of gray, the system becomes a thing of fear, itself.

Not exactly the image of a predator.

The problem comes down to two major factors: age and social status.

We often punish children, very young children, for what we adults, experienced and jaded, see as being threatening and/or sexual. Children are being labeled as sex offenders when they often don't even know what sex is.

Others are actually doing such actions as a result from their own abuse. Instead of helping them, we expel or suspend them from perhaps the one place where they get away from their own abuser.

Ironically, the exact same thing happens in the bullying arena. Behaviors that were previously ignored are
now treated as a new and sudden epidemic. At the same time, we ignore that these behaviors are often either learned behaviors (children being abuse at home) or the result of learning and behavioral disorders that undermine the child's social skills.

Boys will be boys...

...is now expelled.

I'm not saying we should ignore the behavior or not try to right it. I'm saying we are reacting a an extreme way to something that has many causes, perceptions and ways of treating it.

This idea can be applied to prisons, too. We have taken the route that all law-breakers are unsalvageable monsters, despite the evidence that rates of recidivism (re-imprisonment) go down significantly when prisoners are treated with a certain amount of respect, given opportunities, and have a social safety net when they leave.

Throw in the concepts that low income, underprivileged individuals (perhaps those without options, choices, or good role models) are more likely to end up in prison, or that up to half of all prisoners are convicted of situational or victimless crimes, and you have a system that punishes... what, exactly?

There are many possible answers. Minorities is common. Those on the social fringes. Persons with mental handicaps. Persons with social handicaps, such as low social status, poor school systems, a lack of social support. Persons who have suffered forms of abuse that may lead to poor choices, bad learned behaviors, or mental disorders. The list goes on.

We should be trying to help people, not slapping their hands, locking them in the closet and expecting their behavior to magically right itself when it's over.

And, yes, I'm sure we will find some people who are incapable of changing, people who can't be trusted ever again. But we punish everyone like they are those people.

We need to find our compassion, do the dirty work, show mercy as we would have it shown to us, and get these people back on track.

Love this blog?

I, Kalisara, have compiled my favorite blog posts into a book, Witch Way to the Cookies?. You can find it on Amazon.com here or learn more about it on the facebook page, here.

Enjoy!

The Goddess of Ick

Limnos, Greek Goddess of Hunger

There are hundreds of unique goddesses throughout history, around the world. Many of them have become inspirations for the women of our so-called post-feminist society. They represent the independent, capable women that define the modern goddess-woman. They teach us how to be mothers and workers in this new society of semi-equality.



Each goddess represents a side of womanhood: kind, compassionate, capable, nurturing, wise. These aspects are ones that we can understand. They are good and positive. We can say that we are these things, and say them with pride.

But there are still characteristics that many goddesses possess, which, even in our supposedly enlightened society, we see as negative qualities. These are the qualities that we ignore, or push aside as irrelevent. We brush over these things as too dirty, literally and metaphorically. We whitewash these less-then-desirable characteristics from our experiences of Goddess, or turn them into a lesson of who not to be.

Mud is natural for Sekhmet

These characteristics turn a goddess of the feminine into the Goddess of Ick.

But that may not be what these goddesses are telling us. There is strength in having these characteristics that are seen as mean or even weak.

These characteristics, these icky things, are what make a goddess powerful. The dirt and the blood, the so-called weaknesses, show us how to be better humans. They teach us how to be truly powerful women and men.

Even more, they help us to be complete. A shining example of personality is one-sided and, dare I say, boring. When you throw in these icky things, we, and the goddesses, become interesting, lively, whole and even more powerful.

Persephone was a victim,
so what makes her Goddess?

You can see the power of the Goddess of Ick in the way that children are safer playing in the mud then in being kept in a sterile environment. You can find the power in the blood and sweat and tears of a woman giving birth. You can find the darkness of the Goddess in deep black caves filled with teeming life: glowing fungi, slimy bacteria, blind bats, slugs and maggots.

The Goddess of Ick represents all that creates and destroys life. Light and cleanliness interfere with the lifecycle and represent the order that life cannot live in.

We fight so hard to keep our world clean and orderly, to prevent the mud and the dirt from coming into our homes, and into our lives. We sweep, we scrub, we bathe, we try to keep nature from entering our lives unannounced.

But the Goddess of Ick is nature, and she cannot be denied.

The truth of the matter is, we are the mud and the dirt; we are the Goddess of Ick.

Heathenry with Ryan

 Pagan-Musings Podcast has a show outlining Heathenry as a general topic. It is to be noted that Heathens are a diverse group of people with wide-ranging beliefs and practices, and all information should be taken as a part of that, but not representative of all.

Ryan of the Nebraska Heathens United group very kindly helped us with this topic. Several of his suggested resources are listed below.

Books mentioned:

• Our Troth
• Essential Asatru

 Websites:

• The Troth
• Asatru Folk Assembly
• Our Heathen Gods: Library
• Óðrœrir Heathen Journal

Podcasts:

• Ravencast
• Raven Radio

 Blogs:

• The Norse Mythology Blog

Forums:

• Asatru Lore 

A Grand Adventure: Children's publishing

I have a new blog dedicated specifically to Pagan children, Pagan parenting, and Pagan children's books.

I will cross-post a lot, but not everything, so follow both blogs to get your full KaliMa fix.

Check it out here!


Growing Paganism

Blowing Bubbles: A response

Sometimes, the bubble shapes or colors
our perception of the world.

I read a blog post by Teo Bishop, a man I appreciate and admire for his well-though-out ideas and contributions to the Pagan community. This post was called: The Pagan Bubble. I recommend you read it. The following is my response:


One thing that struck me was the assumption that more mainstream groups don't have this bubble. But they do.
I have a cousin in a seminary college. We chat (in a quite friendly manner) on FB about topics. I read his posts. I google a lot of words/phrases when I do this. He is in his Christian seminary bubble, and I don't know all of the language.

Every industry I've worked in
is it's own little world.

In technical trades, we call the language portion of the bubble "jargon". Engineers have jargon. Lawyers have jargon. Doctors and nurses have jargon.

I work in a regulated industry: biopharma. We have jargon, but we also have a "culture", which must be learned in order to effectively operate in regulatory positions. This is known and discussed within the industry.


And, speaking of industries, most types of businesses, particularly technical ones, have "industry standard" procedures and standards. They can be meaningless to outsiders, but are make-or-break for those in the industry. I say this as someone who has argued about the color of signs and material labeling.

Every person has the perception of the world
encased in the bubble of their own experiences.

Everyone lives in a bubble. It is the bubble of our experiences - experiences that, realistically, not everyone has. Whether it's the bubble of culture of the deep south, or the bubble of being "in the know" of talent agencies, rattling off specific colors, textures and fabrics with other designers, or discussing steaming vs blanching with other chefs...