Thursday, January 17, 2013

A Little Bit of (Bad) Luck

Today I was discussing some of the issues that have come in to my life of the past few months. I was talking with a Wiccan, who I hadn't seen in several months, so we were more or less catching up. It was at this point that I realized that our spiritual paths and philosophies diverged drastically.

You see, there have been many unfortunate incidences that have occurred in my life over the past several months. Now, the situations that have come up have not been pleasant by any means. However, I never really looked at them as being a form of cosmic punishment or retribution. But that's exactly what she questioned me on.

First, she asked me who I pissed off; then, and she asked who I had wronged. I explained that we don't do that kind of stuff. We're not into hexing; we're not into cursing. We don't piss people off. We're actually really quiet and boring, and we stay home and watch TV.

Then I mentioned that, aside from all of the rather nasty things that have been happening, certain things in my life are actually going really well. I mentioned that I had finally found a serious motivation to work on my writing. I also mentioned that the writing was going really well, and that I had networking and contacts that I'd never even considered before.

She then suggested that we were not making appropriate offerings toward our gods. This is not only patently incorrect, but also rather inappropriate considering our gods do not demand offerings of us.

So she asked what I was writing about, and if that could have anything to do with my bad luck. I mentioned my science-fiction novel, and she said, "no, that's not it." So I said that the only thing I was working on with any kind of potential for offense was the Goddess of Ick. As soon as I mentioned it, she said. "Drop it."

Now, there's something that you have to understand at this point. The Goddess of Ick is an idea that has sprung from the collective experience and belief system of my entire spiritual life. This book is getting written, even if it's just for me. Telling me to "drop it" is definitely the wrong way to go. So I told her that... nicely.

She then suggested that I was being punished for vanity. After some clarification, I realized she was talking about my sense of pride and success in my writing. When we parted ways, I had a disturbing sensation. I was distinctly uncomfortable. It took me a few minutes to figure out why: she was assuming that I had done something wrong.

She seemed to truly believe that a person could only have this kind of general bad luck if they had either been bad, or redirected somebody's karma, or were otherwise being punished.

The thing is, it never crossed my mind that I was being punished. And I don't think that it's because I was being dense about it. Really this entire situation has felt more like fire. As in, the flames of the forge making one stronger.

Could I really be that delusional? Well, I don't think so.